Strip Club–Euro 2012 Kit Tournament (Group B)

In an ambitious effort to get involved with the upcoming Euros, I followed the draw, game by game, to determine which kit would win Euro 2012 based on my tastes.  These posts are an extension of my Strip Club posts and the epic Kit Tournament done by Avoiding the Drop for the 2010 World Cup.

Special thanks to Mao Football, whose post got this all kicked off for me.  Also to TheScore.ie , who put together a slide show of each jersey.  Finally, 7football created a graphic representation of each strip complete with shirt, shorts and socks.  Truly phenomenal stuff.

Here we go.

——

Netherlands

Denmark

Germany

Portugal

Netherlands v Denmark

The Netherlands kick off the Group of Death wearing the traditional orange, but Nike got it wrong this year.  The Dutch World Cup 2010 kit was ok, with the badge a touch too big and the collar a little disconcerting, but they have regressed at this championship.  The alternating four panels on the front are terrible and they should pray (for the sake of this exercise) that they don’t wear it beyond this match.  As for the Danes, their white away kit is a straightforward adidas template with minimal accents.  The Danes earn all three points.

Germany v Portugal

These two countries have met at the two of the last three major championships, with the Germans winning both (Third Place Match at World Cup 2006 and Quarter-Final at Euro 2008).  In this opening match I am assuming that Germany will wear their white kit and Portugal will go with their maroon home kit.  The German kit would be fine if not for the diagonal pinstripes.  As for the Portuguese, their kit has been relatively simple over the years, which is a good thing, so I give them the win in this match-up.

Denmark v Portugal

The Danes will take the field in their traditional red jersey, a red that always seems to be uniquely Danish.  My only problem with this kit is the shoulders.  Not sure what adidas is going for here (I’ve read/heard that it is a shoutout to the victorious Euro 92 kit), but I don’t like it. Portugal’s away kit is white and features a green and maroon cross in the center.  It works for me and I award them the win.

Netherlands v Germany

What must the TV people think ahead of this match?  Going by the book, it will be the Dutch orange home kit against the German green away kit.  That can’t be good for the audience.  My guess is the Germans will go white.  This match is drab draw with neither kit really doing it for me.

Denmark v Germany

Again a horrifying scenario for the networks as they are faced with the possibility of a Christmas themed game featuring the red of the Danes and the green of the Germans.  Again, neither one is a winner for me so I’m going to call this a draw, which eliminates the Germans from this tough group.

Portugal v Netherlands

Based on the team listings, this match would feature the maroon of Portugal against the black away kit of the Dutch.  Don’t see that happening.  Instead I see Nike making sure they get some mileage out of the away kit so Portugal will go with their white jersey.  The Dutch away jersey is absolute tops.  I’m a sucker for black, and this hits all the right notes.  The difference between the home and away is stark and the Dutch secure all three points in a comprehensive victory, but it’s not enough to get them to the next round.

Standings

Portugal 2 0 1 6
Denmark 1 1 1 4
Holland 1 1 1 4
Germany 0 2 1 2
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  1. My top 3 are Dutch away, Portugal away, Portugal home. I, like you, am a sucker for a black jersey which is why that one is first. Otherwise, I like the “cross within a cross” idea of that white Portugal jersey. Although not terrible appealing to the eye, I appreciate its symbolic value. The Denmark Red is atrocious (as you pointed out) and the beautiful simplicity of the away can’t make up for that design. Also, I don’t have an issue with the Dutch orange as you do. So, for me Portugal and Netherlands would come out of this group.

    • Mike
    • May 28th, 2012

    I like the green one, and EVERYTHING Dutch.

    Mike

    • really don’t like the orange dutch kit. the green germany is meh but felt they could have done more with the home kit.

      • I like the green shirt, I just don’t get a German vibe from it.

      • agreed. i need to research/ask why green is an occasional 2nd strip. red or black seems a much better option.

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